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	<title>Political Humor &#187; Opinion</title>
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	<link>http://knifework.net</link>
	<description>Political Humor and Satire From a Conservative Perspective</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Sun, 25 Dec 2011 23:32:22 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>Dick Blumenthal (D-CT) Correct on a Resume Item</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2011/02/dick-blumenthal-dct-correct-resume-item/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2011/02/dick-blumenthal-dct-correct-resume-item/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 09 Feb 2011 22:03:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Loren</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=1402</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[U.S. Senator from Connecticut Dick Blumenthal has been found to be correct in citing an item of his work history. It turns out that Blumenthal actually is a member of the Senate, as he has been telling reporters since being sworn in last month. Blumenthal has long been rumored to have been accurate on other items of his resume, but this is the clearest confirmation to date. Blumenthal aides, speaking on condition of not having their name linked to Blumenthal, noted that the Senator is often correct about his resume.  &#8220;He gets it right over half the time,&#8221; estimated one staffer.]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2011/02/dick-blumenthal-dct-correct-resume-item/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Happy Birthday, Mr. President</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/08/happy-birthday-mr-president/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/08/happy-birthday-mr-president/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 08 Aug 2010 23:20:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Chuck Dizzle</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=1326</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[On August 5th, 2010, the President of the United States, Barack Obama celebrated his 49th birthday. We think*.  Because Mr. Obama is the leader of the free world, with virtually unlimited resources at his disposal, we were unsure at first of what to get him. Initially, we recalled that the President is a family man.  What then, would be a better gift for a family man than a nice birthday dinner with his lovely wife and daughters?  We had arranged for a private dinner at Chez L&#8217;ego in downtown D.C.  Unfortunately, the First Lady was called out of town at the last minute for official first lady business.  Oh well, she&#8217;s not really all that pleasant to be around anyway. Plan B:  Just Barry and the girls at Five Guys Burgers and Fries.  Since the President is notorious for his difficulty making up his mind, we planned to close down all 22 restaurants in the D.C. area and hope for the best.  Then we remembered that whole childhood-obesity thing&#8230; The best task-force begins at home, as they say.  Also, Sasha went with Michelle.  Oops. In a last ditch effort to salvage this historic birthday (it is, of course, only the [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/08/happy-birthday-mr-president/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Everything is Better Auto-tuned</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/04/autotuned/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/04/autotuned/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 11 Apr 2010 20:16:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Shayne</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=603</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My internet-fu is sometimes suspect, so I may be late to the party on this one.  But if you have not yet seen these videos, you are missing what is quite possibly the most awesome thing on YouTube: Auto-tune the News.  I think so, anyway. Here are a couple of samples, but I suggest you watch them all: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDOYN-6gdRE] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBb4cjjj1gI] h/t: mitrebox]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/04/autotuned/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Guam Jokes!</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/04/guamjokes/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/04/guamjokes/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 02 Apr 2010 16:27:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Chuck Dizzle</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[democrats]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[News(?)]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stupid]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=550</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In honor of this shining moment in American exceptionalism: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsFsn8ekyhw] I bring you some Guam jokes. &#8220;Guam never tips, even when on the business end of a Chuck Norris round-house.&#8221; &#8220;Guam never tips. Sometimes it even ducks out on the bill.&#8221; &#8220;Guam never tips, it just sticks its head into the ocean to hide from predators.&#8221; &#8220;Guam never tips. It was founded by Weebles.&#8221; &#8220;Guam never tips because its center of gravity is at THE EARTH&#8217;S CORE.&#8221; (Cross-posted at my site.)]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/04/guamjokes/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>An Open Letter to the Democratic Party</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/03/an-open-letter-to-the-democratic-party/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/03/an-open-letter-to-the-democratic-party/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 22 Mar 2010 10:13:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Shayne</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[health care]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/2010/03/an-open-letter-to-the-democratic-party/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[FUCK YOU.]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/03/an-open-letter-to-the-democratic-party/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Case of the Missing Census Letter</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/03/the-case-of-the-missing-census-letter/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/03/the-case-of-the-missing-census-letter/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 10 Mar 2010 05:37:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Loren</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bureaucracy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Census]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Government]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Outrage!]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=386</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard on teh Interwebz that the Census Bureau had sent out letters telling citizens that the Census Bureau would be sending them Census forms.  I got no letter. Do I really need to explain how this made me feel?  The hurt, the embarrassment, the humiliation of not getting a letter?  It was awful. How am I supposed to know when my Census form is going to get here, if I don&#8217;t get a letter? Everyone else got one. It isn&#8217;t right! It isn&#8217;t fair. So I called the Census Bureau Chicago office to ask when I&#8217;d get my letter telling me when my Census form was coming.  Here is how that conversation went: They referred me to the Springfield, IL office. Bureaucracy!  It&#8217;s a Byzantine nightmare of functionaries, mandarins, and stone-faced clerks refusing to help a poor citizen, each in turn claiming it&#8217;s not their job.  No wonder there&#8217;s a deficit. The anger was rising in me now. Others have calculated the cost to the government to mail out these letters, which I learned are called &#8220;Advance Letters&#8221;. Important as they are, alerting people that they will be receiving mail in the near future, that cost doesn&#8217;t matter to [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/03/the-case-of-the-missing-census-letter/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>11</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Knifework&#8217;s Official Response to a Blog That Should Have Been Ignoring Him</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/03/knifeworks-official-response-blog-ignoring/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/03/knifeworks-official-response-blog-ignoring/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Mar 2010 21:50:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Shayne</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[I love you]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=379</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A tumultuous firestorm erupted on the interwebs today, seriously altering the lives of 5-6 people.  As I am responsible, I wished to share my thoughts on the matter. First of all, exactly how am I responsible? Well, I touched the match to the powder-keg yesterday with this simple tweet to @badnabes.  An hour and a half later, I was sleeping soundly in my bed, oblivious to the festering anger rumbling up through some dark, lonely corner of the internet. This morning I awoke to a link in my Twitter feed directing me to this blog post. With every word I read, I became more and more aware of the pain I had caused. But should I assume such blame? Should I worry myself into developing bleeding stomach ulcers? Let us examine this cry for help: Someone tweeted at me yesterday in response to this post. The twitterer in question is a total stranger to me, someone who has never read my blog (and probably not many of my tweets) but for perhaps that post and a cursory skim of the front page here. This person has never tweeted “at” me, either publicly or privately, either; nor has this person ever “re-tweeted” me or [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/03/knifeworks-official-response-blog-ignoring/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>When the Right goes Wrong</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/03/when-the-right-goes-wrong/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/03/when-the-right-goes-wrong/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 06 Mar 2010 20:26:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Shayne</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[HipHop]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Things Never to Do With Your Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[White People]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=247</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I run the risk of alienating some of my conservative readers with this post, but sometimes the right does something so absolutely monstrous&#8230;so execrable, hideous and downright repugnant&#8230;that I can not allow it to go unchecked. I am speaking, of course, about this video (if you haven&#8217;t yet watched it, I will pause for a moment and allow you to do so): [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MddREczVeL4] Sorry about that. Now I don&#8217;t know who these guys are, but aside from being birther lunatics they have no business making hip-hop music.  Constitution Kate?  I can&#8217;t even think up a joke for something so lame, and that pisses me off.  It also looks like they put some money and effort into this, which makes it a little sad. I&#8217;m all for turning Barack Obama into a one-termer, don&#8217;t get me wrong.   But can we please see about accomplishing that while keeping our dignity intact? Note to W.A.S.P.&#8217;s: Do not make rap videos.]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/03/when-the-right-goes-wrong/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>We Can Never Thank You Enough, Carly Fiorina</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/02/we-can-never-thank-you-enough-carly-fiorina/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/02/we-can-never-thank-you-enough-carly-fiorina/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 16 Feb 2010 23:34:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Shayne</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Carly Fiorina]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Demonsheep]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=130</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[An anonymous political underling of an unnamed candidate for a certain Senate primary race that shall remain nameless put together a theme song for the Demonsheep (that isn&#8217;t your screams). I liked it.  I added crummy video. Enjoy.  Or don&#8217;t. Die. See if I care. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGiaBQp8mhI]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/02/we-can-never-thank-you-enough-carly-fiorina/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>8</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Demonsheep is taking over the airwaves</title>
		<link>http://knifework.net/2010/02/demonsheep-is-taking-over-the-airwaves/</link>
		<comments>http://knifework.net/2010/02/demonsheep-is-taking-over-the-airwaves/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 11 Feb 2010 01:08:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Shayne</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://knifework.net/?p=91</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Tonight at 9 p.m. pacific your immensely unfriendly neighborhood soul-eater will appear on BigHollywood contributor Larry O&#8217;Conner&#8217;s Internet Radio Show. If you are foolish enough to tune in, you will hear Demonsheep talk about politics and your mom with his demented overlords Leon Wolf, Rick Hornsby, and myself. You can listen to the show here.  May Carly Fiorina have mercy on your soul.]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://knifework.net/2010/02/demonsheep-is-taking-over-the-airwaves/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
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