Author Archive

  • EPA Offers Compromise Regulations on Everything

    In what is seen as a compromise with hard-line Republicans in Congress, the EPA has backed away from its plans to regulate all forms of matter.  While still holding true to Obama Administration policy of regulating everything in existence, the agency will promulgate regulations on...

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  • MAO is always determined to be the bigger person

    Michelle “Antoinette” Obama Sets Frantic Vacation, Campaign Schedule

    Democrats are planning to give First Lady Michelle “Antoinette” Obama a plus-sized role in the fall campaign season. After sitting in on a European vacation seminar in Spain, First Lady Michelle “Antoinette” Obama will return to America to lead by example in the vital area...

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  • Organeaters For America

    Organeaters For America, the undead outreach effort of the Obama regime, has begun tagging its herd for the November elections. “With the loss of the independent vote, we will need lots of fresh blood,” said OFA spokesperson Andy Dote, referring to the frantic rush of...

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  • Official Seal of Mexico (I think)

    Statement by the Embassy of Mexico

    It is with great pride in the efforts of the Obama Administration to right-size American sovereignty that we at Knifework forward to you our translation of the following memorandum: Statement by the Embassy of Mexico Washington D.C, May 25th, 2010 Regarding the Administration’s decision to...

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  • Fancy technology, shifty people

    The Case of the Missing Census Letter

    I heard on teh Interwebz that the Census Bureau had sent out letters telling citizens that the Census Bureau would be sending them Census forms.  I got no letter. Do I really need to explain how this made me feel?  The hurt, the embarrassment, the...

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  • Cable News Networks Ask Help To Root Out Bias

    Cable News Networks Ask Help To Root Out Bias

    Cable news networks, struggling to keep up in the ratings race, will ask the FCC to investigate charges of bias in their news programming, knifework.net has learned. Cable stalwarts CNN and MSNBC made the joint announcement on Thursday, shortly after the daily White House strategy conference call....

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  • I is not moose.

    Vice President Biden Shames Critics With Performance

    In the wake of the recent Health Care Summit, Critics of the Obama Administration are conceding grudging admiration for Vice President Joseph Biden in his handling of his nearly insurmountable workload. “He’s making it look easy,” said a former senior member of John McCain’s campaign...

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  • TeamUSA Hockey Win Prompts Fear of Retaliation

    TeamUSA Hockey Win Prompts Fear of Retaliation

    "We never suspected they would attack us in an unprovoked way, eh," said Jacques de Nordiques, spokesman for the Royal Canadian Ministry of War.

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  • If I can't get my face on there...

    President Appoints Deficit Commission

    Fighting hard against stagnation in the Federal budget deficit, President Obama has commissioned a blue-ribbon panel to recommend ways a commission could study some recommendations for raising taxes. “Let me be clear: this commission I’m commissioning is not about me,” Mr. Obama said, surprising the...

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  • White House To End Self-Imposed Media Blackout

    White House To End Self-Imposed Media Blackout

    Republicans across the country hailed a move by the White House to end its self-imposed media blackout. An administration press secretary close to the issue made the announcement off the record in response to widespread Tea Party disappointment with the President. “The President only made 411...

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  • Tea Party Activists Demand More From President

    Tea Party Activists Demand More From President

    Tea Party activists nationwide are disappointed with President Barack Obama’s first year in office, and are demanding a better second year. Organizer Jane Lastkall of the Vermouth, Wisconsin Tea Party group said, “He starts all of his speeches off with a history lesson, but then...

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  • Democrats Are About More Than Jobs

    Democrats Are About More Than Jobs

    Congressional Democrats have offered up a new Jobs Bill that they say could save up to 30 jobs in the House and 10 in the Senate. “But let me be clear, this is not just about saving jobs in Congress”, said one source who declined...

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