Nobel Committee to Strip Obama of Prize

Oslo (KW) – The Nobel Prize Committee of Five has announced that it is requesting the return of the Peace Prize it awarded US President Barack Obama in 2009.  The committee made the rare decision based on what it called “atrocious and grievous violations” involved in tournament selections.

“We just thought it showed a poor commitment to social justice to pick four number one seeds,” said a committee spokesman. “And then when Kansas lost, it showed what a disaster it was to have the name Nobel associated with this loser.”

The Nobel committee has generally stayed out of the NCAA tournament selection decisions, for fear of injecting politics into its Peace Prize selection process.  “Our integrity is very important to us, so we want to avoid even the appearance of favoritism in the selection process.  But these picks, and the clearly elitist process of class violence inherent in picking only the favorites gave us no choice but to intervene.”

Sources inside the committee said they were reluctant to actually strip the prize until all of the number one seeds actually lost. “If he had been right, that would have been one thing.  But to make such cowardly calls and be totally and completely wrong?  The reputation of the prize itself is at stake.”

No comment was immediately forthcoming from the White House.