Loading ...In what is seen as a compromise with hard-line Republicans in Congress, the EPA has backed away from its plans to regulate all forms of matter. While still holding true to Obama Administration policy of regulating everything in existence, the agency will promulgate regulations on only certain forms of everything.
“Due to Congressional oversight, we lack jurisdiction on some items. So this is a positive move if we in looking across our necks can think,” said an EPA spokesperson, speaking through an interpreter. “We feel confident that regulation of all forms of matter safely and effectively can by us be done, but toward proper universal regulation this is the first day of a long journey.”
EPA scientists have long gathered lists of all types of objects, but have struggled in the past with categorizing those which can be regulated, the types of regulation that are proper for each item, and with prioritizing recommendations. “In these times of fiscal austerity, with budgets not even doubling year to year, we have had to choose our best donkey”, said the EPA. “This reform makes some of that job unnecessary. ”
The new task for the team of experts in the field of everything regulation will be deciding what form matter can take before it is regulated. There is significant debate about whether an object’s solid, liquid, or gaseous state should determine its ultimate status as far as the EPA is concerned.
Professor Olliver Oxenfree of Yourpharmasource.com University is skeptical of the changes. “There is no way to ensure social justice in this flawed process of everything regulation. “The bottom line is we feel strongly that regulation is the right of all objects, at the subatomic level. Trying to regulate based on chemical makeup or physical state is a discredited methodology, and more importantly, may fail to include some objects altogether. “